Redneck Wisdom on Immigration

I was just reading an enlightening article in the New Yorker on the return of the untenable anti-immigrant platform among Republicans when I came across a thought-provoking quote from a South Carolina man. Its clarity and sophistication speaks volumes.

“Some of these people may be coming in here to get jobs washing dishes, but some of them are coming in here to hijack airplanes,” he explained. “If you’re down there trying to look at the people coming across the border, maybe a lot of them are just motivated by economics, and they want a job washing dishes or cutting grass. But I can’t tell Jose Cuervo from the Al Qaeda operatives by looking at them, because they cut their beard off. It’s like trying to get fly manure out of pepper without your glasses on, you know? I mean, not a racist thing, but they’re all brown with black hair and they don’t speak English and I don’t speak Arabic or Spanish, so if they don’t belong here and they don’t come here legally, I want to know who’s here.”

Let’s just hope this ape hasn’t evolved enough to handle electronic voting.

The Holy Grail of Beers

If anyone is interested in going to Westvleteren, Belgium to procure what has been labeled the “holy grail of beers” let me know. A very limited supply requires that we make an appointment with the Trappist monks of St. Sixtus who have been brewing the beer for over 150 years. This is an opportunity that no one can afford to miss. If you accomplish this feat, you will become a living legend and can expect to be buried in the Hall of Kings.

Berlin Thanksgiving

Last Thursday I had my 23rd Thanksgiving, but my first one away from home. And despite that Thanksgiving is one of the few holidays we celebrate of American origin, I was able to have quite a pleasant one here with my friends in Berlin. Jakob and Anna invited me as well as their closest friends over for a nice, intimate, traditional Thanksgiving. Every guest was required to contribute something to the sumptuous feast, so I decided to do an old specialty, apple pie, as well as something I haven’t attempted before, dressing. I think both turned out well, but of course paled when compared to Jakob and Anna’s task, the turkey.

Jakob’s moist masterpiece

To tell you the truth, I was pretty skeptical of my first Thanksgiving away from my family. I figured surely anything we make here will be just bland copy of the real deal (I was thinking something along the lines of precooked turkey, canned cranberry sauce, and paper plates). But leave it to Jakob and Anna to prove me wrong. Everything was fabulous, from the cozy, dim lighting to the relaxed conversations. Anna’s festive setup made me feel right at home and I am proud so say that everything I ate was quality. Special thanks goes out to Anna G. for the fantastic green bean casserole, Anja for that Oreo cheesecake, and of course to the wonderful hosts.

Chowing down.

 

Drag nach Osten

This past Saturday the Studiumform Berlin group headed east to visit the border cities of Frantfurt am Oder and Słubice. I was of course excited because this was not only my first trip to Poland but also to that infamous realm of Eastern Europe. To start off with a frank comment, the whole experience was underwhelming. There simply just wasn’t anything there. Dilapidated buildings, mediocre food, and junk markets were the norm. It was as if I took a trip to Loachapoka and expected a very cultural experience. I hardly even took any pictures because there was not anything remarkable. Perhaps the most disappointing part was our lunch. I sat eagerly waiting for my dish to hit the table, expecting to discover some possible redemption in the Polish cuisine from what looked like to be a good restaurant. What I got was schnitzel that tasted more of scrambled eggs than pork, french fries reminiscent of the AHS cafeteria, and those drab salads that seem to be a staple of Central Europe. I was ready to go home after about an hour in Poland, the country about as exciting as a sack of wet rocks.

Despite what I just mentioned, all wasn’t awful. I did pick up good bottle of Polish vodka with what seemed like pocket change. I had a great time making observations in the Polish market with Christina (why did every stand have a copy of Wrong Turn 2: Dead End?) And the Gluehwein was tasty. Maybe I was just wanted something a bit more authentic from my Polish experience. But I should have figured this with a border town.

Ignorance for Oil

Best-selling author and op-ed contributor Thomas Friedman never ceases to amaze me with his cogent and sensible columns in the New York Times. His latest “Coulda, Woulda, Shoulda” is of particular interest. He asserts that a $1 gasoline tax imposed after 9/11 would have would have done wonders for our economy and solvency. Now although this would be technically a tax increase, such a measure would offset payroll taxes, this permitting the American taxpayer to take more home every paycheck. In addition, Friedman posits that the gasoline tax would also “pay down our deficit, strengthen our dollar, stimulate energy efficiency and shore up Social Security,” as well as making the United States less susceptible to OPEC dominance.

Why didn’t this happen? Proposing taxes on something so cherished as our precious gasoline is political suicide. Never mind that this is really just a reallocation of taxes (you pay at the pump rather than paycheck) and that doesn’t constitute a genuine increase in what one pays. It is sad to say that this reasonable proposal will never hit the debates. I don’t know who to blame more, the disingenuous politicians or the morons that elect them.

Sighting

It happened again. I was walking passed the Neue Wache, a memorial right next to where I work dedicated to those killed by war and tyranny. I noticed that police had stopped the flow of traffic (both in the street and the sidewalk) clearing the area in front of the Neue Wache. A small crowd had gathered and got as close to the Neue Wache as the police would permit. Of course I joined them in an attempt to figure out what the commotion was about. I was standing there patiently with the crowd when suddenly a long caravan of police on motorcycles and black Mercedes pulled up. Out of the leading Mercedes stepped out Armando Guebuza, President of Mozambique, with his family. In a brief ceremony the president laid a wreath at the famous sculpture Mother with her Dead Son by Käthe Kollwitz, then was quickly whisked away.

Wreath laid by the President of Mozambique

This isn’t the first time this has happened. Last month the exact same scenario played out. I was walking home and the police stopped me just short of the Neue Wache. This time, however, it was King Harold V of Norway who laid the wreath. I had no idea that this memorial was so sought by world politicans.

I think this puts my total notables seen in Berlin at seven:

1. Indian Minister Suresh Prabhakar Prabhu at the SPD climate conference, whom I was able to talk to for a few minutes
2. Chancellor Angela Merkel at the Die Neue Welt exhibition opening at my museum
3. King Harold V of Norway
4. Prime Minister José Sócrates also at the Neue Welt
5. Former Chancellor Helmut Kohl at the museum’s 20th birthday celebration
6. Singer/Songwriter Wolf Biermann who performed a concert after Kohl spoke
7. President Armando Guebuza of Mozambique

Hopefully I’ll see some more celebrates in the coming weeks, although anymore would just be ridiculous.

The German Stare

A few weeks ago someone told me about how the Germans have a very particular way of staring.  I thought he was just making it up, but after riding the train to and from work everyday for several weeks, I realized it was true.  When a normal person stares at you, the guy will immediately try and look away as soon as he is discovered, feigning that he wasn’t doing anything wrong.  When a German stares they keep staring.  On the bus the other day, I had an older German staring at me and even though I notice and looked right back at him (typically when one looks away), the guy unabashedly kept staring for several minutes.  Has anyone else encoutered this?

Snow!

I’ve only experience the joys snow a couple of times since I left Utah as a kid (the blizzard of ’93 being one of them). I don’t even think it has snowed at Auburn in over 6 years. But my snowless life took a turn yesterday when I went out to Karstadt to buy a couple of items. I rode the train down a couple of stops, enjoying the warm sunny weather in the early Berlin afternoon. Then as I came out of Karsstadt, I noticed that it had gotten much colder and that it was starting to rain. Waiting impatiently at the train station, I realized that it wasn’t rain at all but snowflakes and a winter landscape descended upon the city. I couldn’t believe my eyes.

Snowy Naumannstrasse

The next day it was still snowing and my friend Christina called me and asked if I wanted to frolic in the snow with her. But by the time we got to Tiergarten, the snow had turned to rain and melted my hopes of nailing her with a snowball. We had to hunt for anything remaining that was worth throwing. At Tiergarten we found this bizarre collection of monoliths scattered in an open field, which according to a sign was apart of a project to collect stones from across the globe. I have no idea who would pay to move enormous boulders halfway around the world. Sadly there was no rocks from North America.

Christina and the big ass rock

I am so pumped for christmas right now.

First Post

So I’ve finally decided to jump on the bandwagon and start a blog. This might be because I have an insatiable need to express myself or my inner history degree is subconsciously telling me to document everything. Whatever the case, you’ll be able to find here tales of my adventures in Berlin and Europe. Something tells me that I should have started this blog when I first arrived, almost a month and a half ago. Rather than going through a dry list of everything I’ve done, I’ll start with last night and slowly fill in the details along the way.

Last night we had a private ceremony in honor of the new exhibit at our museum, called The New World: Portugal and the Age of Discovery. The employees of the German Historical Museum were invited to listen to a few speakers, eat a few hors d’oeuvres, drink some Portuguese wine, and see the unveiling of the exhibit before the official public grand opening the next morning. Two of the speakers were rather notable: Chancellor of Germany Angela Merkel and the Prime Minister of Portugal José Sócrates, who is also the President-in-Office of the Council of the European Union. How our museum managed this is beyond me. They both gave uninspiring speeches on inter-European corporation and globalization, then tied it in with the exhibit by stating that Portuguese explorations in the 15th and 16th centuries marked the begins of globalization. Debatable, but interesting. Chancellor Merkel had clearly not prepared for this occasion very well, for she practically read directly from her notes. Nevertheless, it felt really nice to be in the presence of celebrities.

Portugese Prime Minister José Sócrates